Ends Always Lead To Beginnings

Two suitcases. Two backpacking packs. One bag disguising its weight with a little bear tucked inside. The last bag holding every electronic device we own. I looked at the pile. It felt like lifetimes ago that we started with half this amount. And I tried to think of all the positive things that could come,…

Farewell to 22 Years of Memories

I watched my signature pass from ink to the page where I was no longer in ownership of her. The man was kind in his words, sharing he would get her fixed up and sent to a new family who needed wheels. I had to remember that my memories were the ones I placed into…

As Time Moves In Oregon

As I handed our passports over to the customs agent, I held my breath. It is surreal to see the door nearly open, yet the rush of anxiety surrounds every what-if your brain has conjured in the last several months. Our life is, and always will be, at the mercy of someone else’s hands and…

Until The Door Opens Home

My eyes stared at the ceiling hearing the wind roar around the building. Rain pelted the windows and my thoughts circled with the gusts of Fall by the ocean. We’re farther north on Vancouver Island this month and full of waxing and waning expectations. I can see a foggy Denman Island from my window where…

Ocean Shores of the Island

I laid my head back into the waves, the sand just beneath me with crabs burrowing underneath. Hiding. I felt as if most of the year has been me burying my head into the sand. My world was books, animals, trying to reach a hand to friends hurting, but all I had was technology and…

The Lessons In Early Kidding Season

I looked out the window to hear the donkeys bray and look towards the goat pen. I didn’t think too much of it until I geared up to brave the cold and rounded the corner to see one of the mama goats bleeding. It wasn’t until I walked into the pen that I saw a…

The Year of Isolation

There is no luxury of normal within the last year. Perhaps there was not even an ounce of ability to become more than it is, and was. When I first wrote a blog for 2020, my eyes were wide open to a world full of possibilities. When the dream ended just 3 months in, I…

The Patience of Experience

I sat at the creek, singing softly to myself as Fern created a rock bridge across the creek. His movements thoughtful, deliberate. How simple it felt in this moment. The water navigating over tree fall and moving the rocks further down the river. In this oasis, nothing could harm. In this soft memory, nothing moved….

A Locked Down Canadian Summer

When the doorbell rang, it was as if the realization hit me harder than it had before. It was the arrival of a package of summer clothes from home, a package that one part of me really wanted to be the arrival of people I love, well knowing that reality could not exist on this…

Grief In The Time of Covid

I was upset, how the neighbor reared his words about lack of belonging. Where renters were a grey area in a building agreement, and he disagreed about us being there. I could feel his frustration, but I couldn’t stop my own tears that poured through. It wasn’t just his words, or the interaction, it was…

Mothers and The Act of Noticing

I stood in the kitchen with a friend, the dogs circling like sharks hoping for a scrap of food to accidentally fall from the bench above. “I tell you, it’s going to be the women who heal this world.” She said while twirling a spoon in a bowl. Her eyes focused on the task at…